{"id":2950,"date":"2025-07-02T11:20:36","date_gmt":"2025-07-02T05:50:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/?p=2950"},"modified":"2025-07-02T11:20:40","modified_gmt":"2025-07-02T05:50:40","slug":"gurujis-comedy-news-bulletin-20","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/2025\/07\/02\/gurujis-comedy-news-bulletin-20\/","title":{"rendered":"GURUJI\u2019s COMEDY NEWS BULLETIN"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\ud83d\udce3 Dear friends, \ud83e\udd39\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\udce2<\/a>) \ud83d\udc53 \ud83d\ude04<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udc53 Read it. \ud83d\ude02 Laugh it. \ud83d\udde3\ufe0f Share it.!<\/em> \ud83c\udf36\ufe0f\ud83d\udcfa<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Choose happiness today and every day”<\/a><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

\ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\udd13 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong>\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\ude1c \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83e\udd2f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\ude02 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong> \ud83e\udd13 \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\ude04 GURUJI PRESENTS \u2014 LOL NEWS BULLETIN WITH MASALA<\/strong>\ud83c\udf7f\ud83d\udd7a<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83e\uddf3 In fresh blow to international students, Trump admin plans \u2018fixed periods of stay\u2019
<\/strong>\ud83c\udf93 Guruji says: \u201cTrump is now running a guest house \u2013 stay fixed, go fixed! No overstay, no free snacks!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude06\ud83c\uddfa\ud83c\uddf8\ud83d\udeab<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udca3 India reserves right to pre-emptive strikes on terror: Rajnath tells US
<\/strong>\ud83d\udd76\ufe0f Guruji: \u201cPre-emptive strike = India’s version of \u2018knock knock\u2026 BOOM!\u2019 <\/strong>\ud83d\udd25\ud83d\udca5 Just like sudden mother-in-law visits!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\udc75<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83c\udfdb\ufe0f Senate passes Trump\u2019s \u2018big, beautiful\u2019 bill 51-50
<\/strong>\ud83d\udcb8 Guruji: \u201cThe bill is passed, but the result? A big, beautiful mess is on the way!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83e\udd39\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83d\udcb0\ud83e\udd37\u200d\u2640\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udcbb PM: Digital India bridges divides
<\/strong>\ud83d\udda5\ufe0f Guruji: \u201cDigital India is like Wi-Fi\u2026 sometimes connects hearts, sometimes just keeps spinning!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude05\ud83d\udcf1\u2764\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udcbc Ahead of elections, cabinet approves \u20b91 lakh crore scheme for 3.5 crore jobs
<\/strong>\ud83d\udcb8 Guruji: \u201cA tsunami of jobs! But Guruji wants proof \u2013 not speeches, actual job offer letters!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\udcc3\ud83d\udd8a\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udcca PM: GST served as a powerful growth engine
<\/strong>\ud83d\ude82 Guruji: \u201cIt may be a growth engine\u2026 but many small businesses feel stuck in general class without AC!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude86\ud83d\udcc9\ud83d\ude02<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2696\ufe0f Crime where State killed its own: HC on Tamil Nadu custody death
<\/strong>\ud83d\ude94 Guruji: \u201cWhen protectors become predators, even the law cries: \u2018What kind of cruelty is this!\u2019\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude22\u2696\ufe0f\ud83d\udd28<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udd75\ufe0f\u200d\u2642\ufe0f Under pressure, CM Stalin hands over probe to CBI
<\/strong>\ud83e\uddef Guruji: \u201cWhen the political fire gets too hot, pass the investigation to someone else! CM now playing \u2018CBI pass-the-parcel\u2019!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\udd25\ud83c\udf62\ud83d\udcc2<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2693 Navy\u2019s blue-water capabilities get a double boost
<\/strong>\ud83c\udf0a Guruji: \u201cIndia\u2019s Navy is now like a full-action hero \u2014 stylish even in the ocean!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\udcaa\ud83d\udea2\ud83c\udf10<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2615 Coffee could add years to your life \u2013 only if you drink it right
<\/strong>\ud83e\udd74 Guruji: \u201cBlack coffee = youth potion <\/strong>\u2615\u2728. Add too much sugar and cream? Congratulations <\/strong>\u2014 sweet but short life!<\/strong>\u201d <\/strong>\u26b0\ufe0f\ud83c\udf6d\ud83d\udc80<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udee1\ufe0f India has right to defend; partners should understand: EAM Jaishankar at Quad meet
<\/strong>\ud83d\udc4a Guruji: \u201cJaishankar\u2019s style = calm on the outside, powerful on the inside! Like a diplomat with superhero moves!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\udd76\ufe0f\ud83e\udde0\ud83d\udca5<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udcdc New criminal laws people-centric for justice: HM Amit Shah
<\/strong>\ud83d\udc6e\u200d\u2642\ufe0f Guruji: \u201cNow criminals can\u2019t escape \u2014 unless they use VPN, incognito mode, and grow fake mustaches!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\udd0d\ud83c\udfad<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\ude4f Guruji\u2019s Final Thoughts:
\u201cPolitics, policy, and press conferences \u2013 don\u2019t forget your popcorn… unlimited drama guaranteed!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83c\udf7f\ud83d\udcfa\ud83c\uddee\ud83c\uddf3<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udce2<\/a> “Stay informed, stay hilarious \u2013 Guruji guarantees no boredom!”<\/em> \ud83d\udca5\ud83c\udf89<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yours,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udcd8\ud83d\udd8a\ufe0f\ud83d\ude04 \u201cGuRuJi KaMaRaJ\u201d<\/em> \ud83c\udfad\ud83d\udc74\u2728 \ud83d\ude07\ud83d\udce2<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\udd13 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong>\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\ude1c \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83e\udd2f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\ude02 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong> \ud83e\udd13 \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\ud83d\udce3 Dear friends, \ud83e\udd39\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\udce2) \ud83d\udc53 \ud83d\ude04 \ud83d\udc53 Read it. \ud83d\ude02 Laugh it. \ud83d\udde3\ufe0f Share it.! \ud83c\udf36\ufe0f\ud83d\udcfa “Choose happiness today and every day” \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\udd13 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\ude1c \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83e\udd2f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\ude02 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83e\udd13 \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\ude04 GURUJI PRESENTS \u2014 LOL NEWS BULLETIN WITH MASALA\ud83c\udf7f\ud83d\udd7a \ud83e\uddf3 In fresh blow to international students, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":2866,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"GURUJI\u2019s COMEDY NEWS BULLETIN","jetpack_seo_html_title":"GURUJI\u2019s COMEDY NEWS BULLETIN","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"GURUJI\u2019s COMEDY NEWS BULLETIN,","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[58,59,653],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2950","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-entertainment","category-humour","category-gurujis-comedy-news"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/J-116.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2950","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2950"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2950\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2951,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2950\/revisions\/2951"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2866"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2950"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2950"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2950"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}