\ud83d\udce3 Dear friends, \ud83e\udd39\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\udce2) \ud83d\udc53<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m your Guruji \u2013 here to serve you the hottest news with a dash of humour!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\ud83d\udc53 Read it. \ud83d\ude02 Laugh it. \ud83d\udde3\ufe0f Share it.!<\/em> \ud83c\udf36\ufe0f\ud83d\udcfa<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\udd13 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong>\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\ude1c \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83e\udd2f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\ude02 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong> \ud83e\udd13 \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83c\udfa4 Guruji Comedy News Darbar \u2013 Today\u2019s Tamasha with Global Tadka!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83c\udf0d\ud83c\udfaa<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\uddf3 India-UK Trade Deal has a Message for Trump \ud83c\udfab India resumes tourist visas to Chinese \ud83d\udcc3 FTA with India will be signed today: UK govt \ud83d\udd01 Tejashwi slams rolls revision, says poll boycott an option \ud83d\udcca K\u2019taka plans 2nd caste census after cabinet junked 1st report \ud83c\udf0a Bonhomie after Hostility: Wind in Male seems to favour Delhi \ud83e\udd16 Teens turning to AI for advice, friendship, to \u2018get out of thinking\u2019 \ud83d\udcbc Zelensky faces backlash over new anti-graft law \ud83d\udcaa Getting Future Fit, Tata Tripled Profit in 5 Years \ud83d\udd0e CBDT to Use Tech to Catch Tax Evaders \ud83c\udf10 Digital Wallet Payments must Flow beyond Borders \ud83d\udeab Lok Sabha Still Paused Over Roll Revision Protest \ud83c\udfdb\ufe0f Rajya Sabha Adjourned for 3rd Day Without Any Work \ud83e\udd23 Stay tuned with Guruji, where every news is a laugh-a-thon<\/em>! <\/strong>\ud83c\udfa4\ud83c\uddee\ud83c\uddf3\ud83d\udca5 Want more? Say \u201cJai Ho, Guruji!\u201d<\/em> and I\u2019ll be back tomorrow morning! <\/strong>\ud83c\udf05\ud83d\udce2<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f <\/strong>GURUJI\u2019S MEDITATION TIPS \u2013 Because even your brain needs Wi-Fi disconnection sometimes!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\udcf4<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83c\udf3c 1. Sit Like a Sadhu, Not a Slouch! \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f 2. Close Your Eyes\u2026 But Don\u2019t Open YouTube in Your Mind! \ud83c\udf43 3. Focus on Breath \u2013 In, Out, In, Out\u2026 \ud83d\ude49 4. Let Thoughts Come and Go Like Indian Relatives \ud83d\udd15 5. Silence is Golden\u2026 Unless You\u2019re in Chennai with Autos Honking \ud83d\udd70\ufe0f 6. Start With 5 Minutes \u2013 Not 5 Hours Like Himalayan Yogis! \ud83e\udd23 7. If You Fart During Meditation\u2026 Just Say It\u2019s the Wind of Enlightenment! <\/strong>\ud83d\udca8\ud83e\udeb7 \ud83c\udf1f Final Guruji Gyaan: \ud83d\udece\ufe0f Chant with Guruji Before You Start: \ud83d\udce3 Guruji\u2019s Darbar will never run out of content!<\/em> \ud83d\ude02\ud83d\udc51<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83d\udc49enjoyhumour.blogspot.com \ud83d\ude07\ud83d\udce2<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83d\udc49amazinglifeblog.com!<\/em> \ud83d\ude02\ud83d\udcff \u2728\ud83d\ude0e \ud83d\udcf0\ud83e\udd23 \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n Yours,<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83d\udcd8\ud83d\udd8a\ufe0f\ud83d\ude04 \u201cGuRuJi KaMaRaJ\u201d<\/em> \ud83c\udfad\ud83d\udc74\u2728 \ud83d\ude07\ud83d\udce2<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\udd13 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong>\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\ude1c \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83e\udd2f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\ude02 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/strong> \ud83e\udd13 \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" \ud83d\udce3 Dear friends, \ud83e\udd39\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\udce2) \ud83d\udc53 I\u2019m your Guruji \u2013 here to serve you the hottest news with a dash of humour! \ud83d\udc53 Read it. \ud83d\ude02 Laugh it. \ud83d\udde3\ufe0f Share it.! \ud83c\udf36\ufe0f\ud83d\udcfa “Choose happiness today and every day” \ud83d\ude04 \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\udd13 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\ude1c \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83e\udd2f \ud83e\udd74 \ud83d\ude0f \ud83e\udd2a \ud83d\ude1c\ud83d\ude02 \ud83e\uddd9\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \ud83e\udd13 \ud83d\ude0e \ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3109","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3109","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3109"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3109\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3110,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3109\/revisions\/3110"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3109"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3109"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amazinglifeblog.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3109"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}“Choose happiness today and every day” \ud83d\ude04<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83d\udce6 Trump ji, India and UK are busy unboxing their trade gift\u2026 You can keep tweeting in CAPS!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\udce2\ud83c\uddee\ud83c\uddf3\ud83c\uddec\ud83c\udde7<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83e\udd5f Welcome back, China! But this time, bring noodles, not border drama!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83c\udf5c\ud83d\udeab\ud83c\udfd4\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83d\udd8a\ufe0f UK said \u201cI Do\u201d! India said \u201cFinally!\u201d Modi ji already planning honeymoon in London!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udc83\ud83d\udc82\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83d\udc8d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83d\uddf3\ufe0f Arrey bhai, if boycott is the only strategy left, even EVMs need a vacation!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udca4\ud83d\udda5\ufe0f\ud83d\ude48<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83d\uddc3\ufe0f Census game in Karnataka: Try, try again till you get the result you want!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83e\udde9\ud83d\udd75\ufe0f\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83d\udccb<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83c\udf2c\ufe0f From stormy seas to bromance breeze\u2014India-Maldives now singing \u201cLet it go!\u201d<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83c\udfb5\ud83c\udfd6\ufe0f\ud83e\udd1d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83e\udde0 AI is new BFF\u2014no judgement, no homework, only memes and motivation!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udcf1\ud83d\udcac\ud83e\uddf8<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\u2696\ufe0f Corruption ko thoda bhi touch kiya toh Ukraine politicians shouting: \u201cKoi naa dekhe hamari leela!\u201d<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83c\udfad\ud83d\udea8<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83d\ude98 Tata to profits: \u201cCatch me if you can!\u201d Investors doing bhangra in stock market!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udc83\ud83d\udcc8\ud83d\udcb0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83d\udce1 Tech will find your secret Swiss dreams! No more \u201ckaala dhan under mattress\u201d!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udecf\ufe0f\ud83d\udcb8\ud83d\ude94<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83d\udcf2 UPI is going global! Soon even aliens might PayTM us for pani puri!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udc7d\ud83d\udcb5\ud83c\udf0d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83c\udfae Democracy on pause… remote control missing\u2026 someone please press \u2018Resume\u2019!<\/em> <\/strong>\u23f8\ufe0f\ud83c\udf9b\ufe0f\ud83e\uddd3<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83e\ude91 House of Elders turned into House of Nappers. Even Parliament WiFi got bored!<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udca4\ud83d\udcf6\ud83c\udf75<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/strong>\ud83e\uddd8\u200d\u2642\ufe0f \u201cPolitics may pause\u2026 but punchlines must flow!\u201d<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udcac\ud83d\ude0e<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Back straight like government rules <\/strong>\ud83d\udcdc, not like your mobile bill <\/strong>\ud83d\ude02.
Bonus Tip: Don\u2019t lie down \u2013 meditation, not invitation to sleep! <\/strong>\ud83d\ude34\ud83d\udecf\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
No grocery list, no ex, no \u201cWhat if I was a Bollywood star?\u201d fantasies <\/strong>\ud83c\udfa5\ud83d\udc83
Just\u2026 Breathe. Not like a buffalo <\/strong>\ud83d\ude2e\u200d\ud83d\udca8 but like a Zen mosquito <\/strong>\ud83e\udd9f\u2728<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
If brain says \u201cPizza! Salary! Neighbour\u2019s car!\u201d
Just say: \u201cShhh beta, Guruji is buffering inner peace now\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude0c\ud83d\udd15<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
They\u2019ll enter without knocking <\/strong>\ud83d\udeaa,
Just smile and say, \u201cAcha, acha\u2026 Bye!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\udc4b\ud83d\ude02<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Find a quiet place\u2026
If impossible, just meditate on accepting chaos <\/strong>\ud83e\udd37\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83d\udd49\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Even your smartphone needs time to charge…
Your brain battery also deserves me-time<\/em> <\/strong>\ud83d\udd0b\ud83d\ude4f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
No shame, only salvation <\/strong>\ud83d\ude07<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Don\u2019t expect instant Nirvana.
Even Maggi takes 2 minutes! <\/strong>\ud83c\udf5c\ud83e\udde0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOmmmm My God, What a Life!\u201d <\/strong>\ud83d\ude02\ud83d\udd49\ufe0f<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n