📣 Dear friends, 🤹♂️ 📢) 👓
I’m your Guruji – here to serve you with a dash of humour! 😄
😂📢 Guruji Comedy News Bulletin in English 😎📰
👉 PM Modi in China Live 🇮🇳🐉
Xi Jinping says “vital to be good neighbours”…
Guruji Punchline: “Yes, but only if the neighbour doesn’t keep stealing WiFi and border land!” 📶🏔️🤣
👉 Modi’s tone: Vishwas & Samman ✨
Guruji Punchline: “Finally, two words even politicians can’t sell in black market!” 😂💰
👉 Closer State–Prefecture Linkages 🏛️
Guruji Punchline: “Sounds like marriage alliance talks… only difference – here, dowry is in billions!” 💍💸
👉 US court ruling on tariff illegal – not for India ⚖️
Guruji Punchline: “Don’t worry India… Uncle Sam’s court only works like an exclusive club – members only!” 🚫🍹🤣
👉 Modi calls Zelensky amid China trip ☎️
Guruji Punchline: “One side Great Wall, other side Great War – Modi ji truly has unlimited calling plan!” 📞🌍😂
👉 India & Japan collaborate on defence & minerals ⚔️⛏️
Guruji Punchline: “Samurai swords + Indian jugaad = World’s first WiFi-enabled nunchaku!” 🥷📡🤣
👉 TN CM Stalin in Germany 🇩🇪
Guruji Punchline: “Searching investments abroad… because local businessmen are too busy investing in IPL teams!” 🏏💰😂
👉 Dhankhar wants MLA pension restored 💸
Guruji Punchline: “Politicians without pension? Impossible! Even God has promised them ‘lifetime benefits’ in every janma!” 😂♻️🙏
👉 Tech-savvy thieves steal SUVs 🚙💻
Guruji Punchline: “Earlier thieves needed lock-picking tools… now just WiFi password! Chor 2.0 – powered by AI!” 🤖🔑🤣
👉 Akhilesh backs Tejashwi as Future CM 🎤
Guruji Punchline: “One unemployed youth recommending another… true Indian job referral system!” 🧑💼➡️👨💼😂
👉 Google warns Gmail users of data breach 📧🔓
Guruji Punchline: “Gmail password leaked? Don’t panic – 90% Indians already use ‘12345’ or ‘iloveyou’ anyway!” 🤣❤️🔑
😎✨ Guruji Wisdom: “Politics is like Gmail – full of drafts, spam, and sometimes, a hacked account!” 📩🤣
😎🙏 Guruji’s Weekend Happiness Formula! 🎉
Weekend is not for sleeping like Kumbhakarna 🛌🤣, it’s for recharging your mind, body & WiFi connection 📶😂. Here’s how you can spend your weekend with happiness and fun:
🌞 1. Start with sunshine, not phone!
👉 Instead of scrolling reels the moment you wake up, open the window, take a deep breath and say, “Hello world, I am still alive!” 🌍😅
🧘 2. Do a ‘Happy Yoga’
👉 Not heavy yoga… just stretch, smile, and maybe try laughing yoga! 🤣 Laughter is the cheapest weekend trip!
☕ 3. Slow breakfast, fast jokes
👉 Make your favourite idli, dosa, or even noodles 🍜… but eat it slowly, crack jokes with family. Weekend breakfast should be “buffet of bonding”. 🍽️❤️
🚶 4. Move your body, not just your mouth!
👉 Take a walk, cycle, or dance like no one is watching (except maybe the neighbour peeping 👀😂).
🎲 5. Play time
👉 Cards, chess, carrom, cricket, even dumb charades… play anything but don’t play with people’s feelings 😜.
📚 6. Hobby Hour
👉 Read, paint, sing, write, garden 🌱—do that one thing that gives you pure joy.
🎬 7. Family Movie / Music Night
👉 Choose comedy or feel-good movies, not horror… weekend is for sweet dreams, not nightmares! 😅
📞 8. Call a friend
👉 Just chat, gossip, laugh. Friendship is the real weekend WiFi. 📱😂
🙏 9. Gratitude Time
👉 Spend 5 minutes thanking God, life, and even your noisy neighbour. Gratitude = happiness booster. ✨
😴 10. Sleep like a king
👉 Recharge fully… because Monday will come like a surprise test! 📚🤣
🌟 Guruji’s Wisdom Punchline:
👉 “Weekend is not for escaping life… it is for embracing life with full battery!” 🔋😊
Choose happiness today and every day
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
📢 “Stay informed, stay hilarious – Guruji guarantees no boredom!” 💥🎉
👉amazinglifeblog.com
Yours,
📘🖊️😄 “GuRuJi KaMaRaJ” 🎭👴✨ 😇📢
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
