📣 Dear friends, 🤹♂️ 📢) 👓
🌞😂 Guruji Comedy News Bulletin – Special Edition 🎤📜
📰 “Our future can’t be at mercy of others: PM”
👉 Guruji punchline: Arrey wah! Future is like WiFi password… don’t depend on neighbour’s hotspot, make your own network! 📶😂
📰 “Goyal heading to US for trade talks”
👉 Guruji punchline: Poor fellow, flight ticket says business class, but talks will be in classroom style homework! ✈️📚🤣
📰 “Visa jolt could spark GCC boom in India”
👉 Guruji punchline: Wah re! Visa denied there, chai shop opened here. From Gulf return to “Gully Return”! ☕😂
📰 “4,515 children adopted last year”
👉 Guruji punchline: Superb! At least kids found parents faster than politicians finding principles! 👶❤️😂
📰 “White House: New policy to deter misuse of H-1B”
👉 Guruji punchline: Arrey baba, H-1B is like gym membership… Americans pay, Indians use! 🏋️♂️😂
📰 “Chip to ship, all must be made in India: PM”
👉 Guruji punchline: Correct saar! From potato chips to rocket ship 🚀… Made in India with masala flavour compulsory! 🌶️😂
📰 “Kant: Visa hike to choke US innovation, help India”
👉 Guruji punchline: America chokes, India smokes… startups rising like filter kaapi steam! ☕🔥😂
📰 “China’s Pony AI, WeRide take robotaxi rivalry to Singapore”
👉 Guruji punchline: Robot taxi? If it’s like auto driver in Chennai, robot will also say: “Meter illa, 500 fixed!” 🤖🚕😂
📰 “India ideal host for World para athletics: WPA chief”
👉 Guruji punchline: True! We host cricket, hockey, kabaddi, politics drama… Para athletics will be most disciplined! 🏃♂️👏😂
📰 “Rising Paywall may Push More US Jobs to India”
👉 Guruji punchline: Wah! Paywall there, payroll here… America’s firewall, India’s fire-up! 🔥💻😂
📰 “Tremors in Tech Inc as Trump Rocks H-1B Dream”
👉 Guruji punchline: Trump is like marriage broker… cancels engagement last minute! 💔😂
📰 “Law Minister urges depts to stop filing appeals”
👉 Guruji punchline: Wah! Govt finally saying—Stop wasting papers, use WhatsApp forward as judgment! 📱😂
📰 “H-1B Visa Hike a Return Gift from Trump to Modi: Congress”
👉 Guruji punchline: Return gift? Arrey, then please also give ladoos and thamboolam packet! 🎁😂
📰 “Swan Defence signs Rs 4,250-crore pact with Gujarat Maritime Board”
👉 Guruji punchline: Swan Defence? Sounds like Bollywood movie… “Kabootar ja ja jaa” remix with submarine! 🦢⚓😂
Guruji’s Advice: Don’t wait for visa… Create your own visa – “Very Intelligent Smart Action” in India! 💡🇮🇳😂
How to develop Inner Wealth?
😎📿 Guruji Gyaan Time – Developing Inner Wealth 💰✨ (with comedy masala + emojis)
👉 Arrey Frineds , outer wealth means Rolex watch, BMW car, Dubai trip. Inner wealth means peace of mind, self-respect, and free WiFi of happiness. 🧘♂️📶😂
🪙 Step 1: Deposit Laughter in Your Heart Bank
Every smile is like fixed deposit. The more you laugh, the more interest your soul collects. 😂💖
(Warning: Too much anger = penalty charges. 🤬💸)
🪙 Step 2: Control Your Desires Like You Control TV Remote
You want car, bungalow, gold chain… arre, first control Netflix autoplay! 📺😂
Less greed = more speed towards inner wealth! 🏃♂️💨
🪙 Step 3: Gratitude is the Real Cryptocurrency
Say “thank you” to life daily. 🙏
Even if you only get idli-sambar instead of pizza… remember, idli is zero-calorie happiness coin. 🥞😂
🪙 Step 4: Invest in Relationships, Not Just Real Estate
Flat in OMR will give EMI tension, but flat smile to your family will give lifetime pension. 🏠❤️😂
🪙 Step 5: Meditation is the ATM of Calmness
Close eyes, breathe in-out, and withdraw peace like cash from ATM. 🏧🧘♂️
(But here balance never goes “insufficient funds” 😂)
🪙 Step 6: Service is the Mutual Fund of Karma
Help others. Smile at strangers. Give biscuits to street dog. 🐶🍪
Returns? Blessings, goodwill, and inner WiFi speed 5G! 📡😂
🪙 Step 7: Compare Less, Live More
Neighbour bought new car? Arrey, you also have… auto-rickshaw friendship with driver anna. 🚗➡️🚕😂
Stop comparing, start caring.
💡 Guruji’s Punchline Wisdom:
Outer wealth buys AC room ❄️… Inner wealth gives cool sleep without AC! 😴😂
Choose happiness today and every day
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
📢 “Stay informed, stay hilarious – Guruji guarantees no boredom!” 💥🎉
👉amazinglifeblog.com
Yours,
📘🖊️😄 “GuRuJi – KaMaRaJ” 🎭👴✨ 😇📢
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
