📣 Dear friends, 🤹♂️ 📢) 👓
I’m your Guruji – here to serve you the hottest news with a dash of humour! 😄
👓 Read it. 😂 Laugh it. 🗣️ Share it.! 🌶️📺
“Choose happiness today and every day”
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
🤣📢 Guruji’s Comedy News Bulletin – Today’s Spicy Masala with Mindful Fun! 🍿🗞️
Powered by Tea, Twitter & Tension! ☕🐦💥
🧔🚀 “To give you back your freedom”: Elon Musk launches America Party
➡️ Guruji: “Brother Elon thought – bought Twitter, runs Tesla… now let’s take America on lease too! 🗽🔋”
😂 Freedom’s free trial is about to start, go ahead and log in, dear folks! 🤖🇺🇸
🌍 BRICS Summit: India-Brazil focus on multipolar world
➡️ Guruji: “There was a time when Brazil was only famous for football… now they’re scoring goals in BRICS too! ⚽🌎”
🤝 While building a multipolar world, everyone’s getting dizzy! 🌐🌀
💸 “Wealth is getting concentrated in the hands of the rich”: Minister Gadkari
➡️ Guruji: “The rich are getting richer, and we’re busy just understanding the interest on our EMIs! 🧾💳”
📉 The country’s budget has become like a soap opera – suspense, drama, and tears all around! 😭📺
💼 ED files money laundering case against Sonia & Rahul (National Herald)
➡️ Guruji: “What a story! Whether it’s politics or Netflix – the sequel craze never ends! 🎬🕵️♂️”
⚖️ National Herald’s new season – ‘The Money Heist Reloaded’! 💰🚨
🇮🇳 India beats US, China & G7 to become one of the most equal societies
➡️ Guruji: “Yes! Everyone is equal now… equally affected by inflation, EMIs, and fuel prices! 🛢️😵💫”
💪 True equality means – everyone is jobless, everyone is stressed! 🤷♂️💥
💱 Rupee holds steady in early July despite global headwinds
➡️ Guruji: “Seems like the Rupee is into yoga – while everything shakes, it’s stable as a table! 🧘♂️💸”
🌪️ The headwinds came, but Rupee said – ‘I am self-reliant!’ 🚁🇮🇳
👬 Raj Thackeray & Uddhav share stage – “Will stay together”
➡️ Guruji: “Wow! New friendship scenes in political Bigg Boss – ‘Used to fight before, now they hug!’ 🤗📢”
🪢 Public is confused: Is this a marriage or a reality show? 🎥💒
🔫 Arms dealer linked to Vadra is now a fugitive
➡️ Guruji: “The arms dealer ran away… but the police are still busy checking helmets! 🏍️🎯”
😹 Brother, the bazooka went missing, but your silencer is still illegal! 🔍🚓
📦 BRICS to denounce Trump’s tariffs at the summit
➡️ Guruji: “Summit or roast session? BRICS said – ‘Trump, your duty is high, but our patience is low!’ 🍗🎤”
🧾 When it comes to taxes, all countries suddenly become best friends! 💼🌐
🏏 Shubman Gill quietly climbs to top role in Indian team
➡️ Guruji: “When everyone wants the spotlight, brother Shubman became a superstar in silent mode! 🔇🌟”
🧠 A true genius is the one who hits sixes without making any noise! 🏆🎯
Guruji’s LOL Wisdom of the Day 🤪📿
🌟 “If life gives you lemons… squeeze them on paneer tikka and enjoy, in the name of the Almighty!” 🍋🔥🧀
🚨 BREAKING NEWS FROM MY LIFE:
I just tried to meditate for peace…
But my Wi-Fi disconnected,
Now I’m truly disconnected from the universe! 😤📶🚫
🤣 Morning Motivation:
Why chase your dreams 🏃♂️💭
…when you can just go back to sleep and dream better ones? 😴🌈✨
👵 Grandma said: “Dear, drink turmeric milk for immunity!”
I said: “Grandma, I need tequila shots for this toxic world!” 🍹😵💫
💔 Relationship update:
She said, “You never listen to me!”
I replied, “What did you say?”
…Now I’m single and spiritually available. 🙃🛐
🙏 So friends, remember – whether the news is spicy or serious, Guruji’s punchlines will give you a dose of laughter! 😂📿
See you tomorrow – till then, keep smiling and keep earning! 💸🌞
🧘♂️ Remember – don’t take stress… Guruji’s Bulletin is here to bless! ✨😎
Come back tomorrow for more news served with samosa and sass! 📰🤣
📢 “Stay informed, stay hilarious – Guruji guarantees no boredom!” 💥🎉
👉Amazinglifeblog.com
Yours,
📘🖊️😄 “GuRuJi KaMaRaJ” 🎭👴✨ 😇📢
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
