📣 Dear friends, 🤹♂️ 📢) 👓
⚡🤣📢 Guruji Comedy Bulletin – English Edition 📢🤣⚡
1️⃣ Modi ji said: “India is reducing pollution and building smart solutions.” 🚮♻️
👉 Guruji says: Correct! Now only problem—people still honk like it’s Diwali every day! 🎆🚗📯
2️⃣ India trading in Rupees with BRICS instead of dollars 💵➡️₹
👉 Guruji says: At last! Dollar left WhatsApp group, Rupee is new admin! 📱😂
3️⃣ India may ask EU for same deal as US 🤝🇪🇺
👉 Guruji says: EU thinking—“Bro, you are not Netflix to ask for ‘same plan on all devices’!” 📺😆
4️⃣ Lancet warns AI may deskill doctors 🤖🩺
👉 Guruji says: Soon doctors will say—“Please restart patient, maybe bug will fix itself.” 💻⚰️😂
5️⃣ India-US Levy Hotline remains open ☎️
👉 Guruji says: Only problem—half call time goes in “Can you hear me now?” 📞🙉
6️⃣ Rajnath ji says: “Need capacity for long wars.” 💣
👉 Guruji says: First give soldiers unlimited data pack, then think of war! 📱💥
7️⃣ US colleges say: “We’ll go to hell without Chinese students.” 🎓🇨🇳
👉 Guruji says: Even in hell, they’ll run tuition classes! 🔥📚😂
8️⃣ Russia rejects EU troops in Ukraine 🇷🇺🚫
👉 Guruji says: Putin treating EU like strict bouncer—“Not on the list, go home!” 🕺❌
9️⃣ India may be 2nd-largest economy by 2038 📈
👉 Guruji says: But still aunty will say, “Beta, when will you buy own house?” 🏠😂
🔟 India Inc says: Economy strong amid challenges 💪
👉 Guruji says: Like man running marathon after eating full biryani! 🍛🏃♂️🤣
1️⃣1️⃣ Forgiving is Freedom 🙏
👉 Guruji says: True, but wife never forgives hubby who forgets anniversary! 💐😅
1️⃣2️⃣ India hosting FIDE World Cup 2025 Chess ♟️🏆
👉 Guruji says: Chess popularity growing so much, even traffic cops moving like bishops! 🚦😂
1️⃣3️⃣ Every country has historical milestones 🌍✨
👉 Guruji says: India’s biggest milestone = waiting at railway crossing 30 minutes! 🚂🤣
1️⃣4️⃣ Dharmasthala hoax: Anti-temple gang faces charges 🛕🚨
👉 Guruji says: Moral of story—Don’t play fake games with God, His Wi-Fi never disconnects! 📡🙏😂
⚡🎤 Guruji signing off: “News over, but comedy unlimited… like government promises!” 😜🔥
🤣🎤 Guruji’s Stand-Up Comedy on Today’s News 🎤🤣
Crowd claps… Guruji enters with mic, long beard swinging, big smile 😁
👉 India trades in Rupee with BRICS 💵➡️₹
Guruji: Dollar crying in corner like ex-boyfriend… “After all I did for you, you leave me for Rupee?” 💔😂
👉 AI may deskill doctors 🤖🩺
Guruji: Soon doctor will say… “Your appendix has virus… Please download update 2.0.” 💻🤣
👉 India-US Levy Hotline remains open ☎️
Guruji: Both leaders talking every day like Indian aunties: “Khaana khaya? Tariff lagaya?” 🤣🍲💰
👉 US Colleges say without Chinese students we’ll go to hell. 🎓
Guruji: Don’t worry… in hell, Chinese students will open tuition center, coaching for demons! 🔥📚😂
🎤 Guruji bows:
“Friends laughter is always unlimited!” 📡🤣✨
Choose happiness today and every day
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
📢 “Stay informed, stay hilarious – Guruji guarantees no boredom!” 💥🎉
👉amazinglifeblog.com
Yours,
📘🖊️😄 “GuRuJi KaMaRaJ” 🎭👴✨ 😇📢
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️