😂 | Modi–Trump Friendship, Kerala Snakebites, Pakistan Fumes & Silver-Haired Superstars!”
🤣 “Mind Open, Mouth Laughing!” Edition 😄📰
🕉️ “When politics mixes with popcorn, even meditation gets spicy!” 🍿😜
🧘♂️ 1️⃣ Modi & Trump: The ‘Gaza Gala’ Duo 🇮🇳🤝🇺🇸
Guruji says: “Modiji praises Trump’s Gaza plan again! Looks like international friendship has turned into a full-season Netflix series — ‘Two Leaders & a Peace Plan!’ 🎬😂”
🐍 2️⃣ Kerala Makes Snakebites a Health Priority 🏥🐍
“Kerala says no more venom drama! 🐍 Even the snakes are applying for Aadhaar cards now — ‘so that hospitals can identify them properly!’ 🤣📜”
💣 3️⃣ Pakistan Fumes as Taliban Backs India 🇮🇳🔥
“Pakistan shouting, Taliban supporting India — Guruji confused! 😵 Next what? Maybe aliens will apply for Indian citizenship! 👽📄”
👴 4️⃣ Age Just a Number, Silver Streaks Still Zooming 🚴♀️✨
“Guruji saw one 80-year-old uncle doing yoga like a rubber band! 😆 Moral: Age is just a number, but joint pain is still real! 💪😂”
💼 5️⃣ Centre Has No Plan to Raise ‘Creamy Layer’ Cap 🥛💰
“Guruji says — no creamy layer increase means the paneer class is still stuck in the middle! 🧀🤣 Time to meditate, not calculate!”
💬 6️⃣ When the Shoe Fits… 👞💓
“When the shoe fits, foot forgotten; when the belt fits, belly forgotten; when the heart fits, enemies forgotten! 😄 Guruji says — forget Fitbit, fit your attitude first! 🧘♂️💪”
🌏 7️⃣ India Among Best Places to Deploy Capital 💸🌟
“Torbjorn Caesar says India is the best place to invest! Guruji says — please deploy some capital in Guruji’s ashram also! I’ll give 200% laughter return! 😂📈”
😈 8️⃣ Akhilesh Says: ‘Infiltrator’ UP CM Should Go Back! 🏔️😅
“Guruji says — these leaders are changing states faster than cricketers change jerseys! 🏏👕 Soon, there’ll be an IPL for politicians — ‘Indian Political League!’ 🤣🏆”
🎓 9️⃣ UK PM Invites Indian Talent 🇬🇧📚
“British PM Starmer says ‘Indians welcome!’ Guruji says — after Trump’s visa rules, Indians are ready to study even on Mars! 🚀📘”
🩺 🔟 90% Indians Ready to Pay More for Certified Healthcare 💊💰
“Guruji says — Indians will pay extra for certified healthcare but still ask a pharmacist for free advice and cough syrup! 😂💉”
🏨 11️⃣ Travel & Hotels Booming Before Diwali ✈️🎆
“Guruji warns — before booking a hotel, check if they provide ‘mosquito-free meditation zone!’ 🦟🧘♂️🤣”
🕰️ 12 Guruji Wisdom Corner 🧘♂️💫
“Time flows — no one can stop it ⏳ So stop scrolling reels and start rolling your destiny! 📱➡️🧘♂️”
“Real happiness comes from within — not from Wi-Fi signal or wealth! 💖💸”
😄 🌺 GURUJI’S FINAL BLESSING:
“Keep your heart light, your laughter loud, and your phone charged — because even enlightenment needs notifications! 🔔🤣📿”
How to Control Obesity Before It Controls You?
😅 1. Guruji’s Warning: “Your Stomach Is Not a Storage Unit!”
My dear rasgulla warriors 🍩—remember, your tummy is not a warehouse for leftover biryani! 😆
When your plate says “enough,” but your heart says “just one more,” that’s not love… that’s self-sabotage in curry flavour!
Before eating, ask yourself: “Am I hungry or just bored?”
If the answer is “bored,” then go chew a carrot 🥕… or better, chew on your life decisions! 😜
🏃♀️ 2. Move That Body Before It Files a Complaint!
Guruji says, “Exercise is not punishment. It’s how you remind your body that you’re still alive!” 😆
You don’t need to run a marathon. Just chase your auto before it leaves 🚗💨 or dance when mosquitoes attack! 🕺
Laugh loudly for 5 mins — it burns calories and confuses your neighbours! 😂
🍭 3. Sugar: The Sweet Serial Killer 😈
Guruji declares — sugar is like that charming ex. Sweet, irresistible, and completely bad for your system! 😏
Every spoonful whispers, “Just one more,” until your jeans shout, “No more!” 😩
Replace sweets with fruits 🍎 — nature’s candy that doesn’t need insulin’s permission!
🧂 4. Control Portion, Not Emotion
Guruji says, “Learn to stop when full. Even your car stops at the fuel limit!” 🚗
Emotional eating never solved heartbreak — only expanded waistline! 💔➡️🍰
If you’re sad, call a friend.
If you’re angry, go for a walk.
If you’re bored, come listen to Guruji — calories of laughter guaranteed! 😄
🥗 5. Make Food Your Friend, Not Boss!
Food is meant to give energy, not identity!
Don’t say “I’m a foodie” — say “I’m a fit-die!” 💪🤣
Control obesity before it starts, controlling your buttons, belts, and blood pressure! 😅
You don’t have to be thin like a breadstick — just be fit, fun, and full of life (not fat)!
💬 Guruji’s Mantra of the Day:
“Eat with your brain, move with your legs, and laugh with your heart — obesity will pack up and leave!” 😎❤️
Choose Happiness Today And Every Day
🧘♂️ 😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
📢 “Stay informed, stay hilarious – Guruji guarantees no boredom!” 💥🎉
👉amazinglifeblog.com
Yours,
📘🖊️😄 “GuRuJi – KaMaRaJ” 🎭👴✨ 😇📢
😎 🤓 🧙♂️😂😜 🤪 😏 🥴 🤯 🥴 😏 🤪 😜😂 🧙♂️ 🤓 😎 🧘♂️
#GurujiComedyNews 😂#AmazingLifeBlog 🌍#ModiTrump 😄#KeralaSnakeDrama 🐍#PakistanFumes 😜#IndianHumor 😂
#LaughAndLearn 😆#ComedyWithWisdom 😇
